I could go now and get him a gift. What? Cannot think of anything. It has to be something thoroughly silly, because that is what I do. That is my place in this scheme of things. But he is hard to please. Completely fussy about clothes and so on. I have done the photo in frame of monster and me theme to death (he loves them, they are all over his office). Oh will figure something out!
We were discussing plans of what we could do (considering various constraints, such as the FIFA world cup game and the plan of travel - not me! him!). Something involving basketball? Dinner perhaps? Dancing (sure, right, like I would! no way! I wouldn't!)? The monster got pissed off instantly when we said we would go without her. I won't make you a card, she pouted. Whatever, girl, we don't need your card! Silly child.
Mum-in-law is bound to figure out something nice for lunch. Including something sweet, as is the custom. I will act as her assistant, per usual. Yes, a nice family lunch, wherein we resolve not to lose our temper at the child. Yes, that will be a good thing.
The world's leading feminist (I mean me, I feel like I have the only patent on it. That my brand of it is the only one that makes sense. That everyone else's feminism is flawed in some manner), I declared this morning 'You are the guy, you figure out something' Riiiiiggght like that is going to happen!
On the other hand, I think, its no big deal. Thirteen is just a number. Its a lifetime already and a lifetime ahead of us as well. Every time I think of him, however angry I am at some silly stuff, or however happy I am with some silly thing, I think of how any other life would have been impossible to bear. Sometimes, for all my talk about my dad and mum and my childhood and the wonderful role modelling and atmosphere and all that, I feel that if not for him, I would have been a very very different Kenny. My confidence, my independence, my creativity, these and a million other things I owe to him.
I used to feel a bit irritated when I first had the monster, with the fact that she looks so much like him. Everyone would instantly react with this observation (and also add that this was very lucky for girl children, to look like their fathers). I was sleep-deprived, humongously fat, had raw nipples, my hands seemed to smell constantly of wet wipes, couldn't work more than an hour at a time, was constantly worried about colds and sneezes and everything about that tiny girl, and then people would come up and proudly say this. I felt like hitting them. You would, till recently, have heard me crib (although I have gotten rid forever of wet wipes now) that for all my effort, least she could do was to look like me.
Then I had this brainwave. Every time I look at her now, what do I see? I see her father! Who is, love of my life, and soulmate of mine and together for ever and constantly having stars in my eyes for him and so on. And then I was like, Dude, this is the best thing that could happen to you. So thats awesome! (Hope the monkey gets around to making us a card!).
Cheers mates, its anniversary weekend at Kenny's! Will involve much running and basketball and chocolate!